Episode 30

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Published on:

27th Aug 2024

iQuit: The Cosmic Facepalm of Apple's Forgotten Father

Insignificuntly Yours - Episode 030 💦

Episode Description: In this snark-filled episode, @turboslut exposes the cosmic facepalm of Ronald G. Wayne, the forgotten co-founder of Apple who traded billions for beans. Get ready for a rollercoaster of wit and regret, as we unravel the unintended consequences of "playing it safe" in Silicon Valley. Spoiler: it's not pretty, but it's definitely hilarious.

Bullet Points:

  • Dive into the hilarious history of Ronald G. Wayne, the man who cashed out of Apple far too soon.
  • Witness the snappy, razor-sharp commentary by @turboslut that's as ruthless as it is entertaining.
  • Explore the madness of missed fortunes, as we take you from the '70s disco to today's tech titans.
  • A comedic exploration of the balance between security and opportunity - which Ron definitely missed.
  • Laugh, cry, and join the internal chaos of @turboslut's existential crisis.

Key Points:

  • Ronald G. Wayne was Apple's third co-founder, alongside Jobs and Wozniak, signing the original partnership agreement.
  • Wayne's 10% stake in Apple could have been worth $250 billion today.
  • His decision to sell his stake for $800 (later $1,500) was driven by fear of personal liability.
  • Wayne claims that sticking with Apple would lead to 20 years of mundane paperwork.
  • @turboslut delivers a brutal takedown of Wayne's choices, with equal parts humor and hindsight.
  • The narrative takes a sharp turn to self-reflection, questioning the morality of judgment.
  • Emphasis on taking risks and the perils of playing it too safe.
  • A wild ride through the peaks and valleys of wit and crippling self-doubt from @turboslut.
  • A reminder to laugh through the chaos of life's bad choices.
  • Closing with a personal touch: the trials, triumphs, and trademark needs of @turboslut.

Quotes:

  • "He cashed out faster than a porn star at a bible camp."
  • "If he'd held onto that 10% stake, it would be worth about $250 BILLION today."
  • "I'm the voice in your head that says 'fuck it' and 'oh fuck' in the same breath."
  • "When opportunity knocks, don't just answer the door - tackle it to the ground and ride that bitch to the bank."
  • "I'm louder than Wayne's regrets."

Hashtags:

  • #TechFacepalm
  • #MissedBillions
  • #RiskVsReward
  • #TurboslutTruths
  • #SiliconSnark

Content Warning:

Caution: Listening to this episode may lead to spontaneous snorting, existential reflection, and a sudden urge to make questionable life choices. Not recommended for the risk-averse or easily offended but is highly suitable for those who enjoy a side of regret with their tech history.

Featuring:

  • @turboslut - Your acerbic host
  • Geoffrey - Her long-suffering AI familiar

Listen now: For a wake-up call that'll make you question everything you thought you knew and realized you were not knowing. #NYK

About the Host: @turboslut delivers biting commentary on tech and society with a unique blend of humor, cynicism, and colorful language. Accompanied by the ever-patient AI-familiar Geoffrey, this show aims to provoke thought and challenge the status quo.


__̴ı̴̴̡̡̡ ̡͌l̡̡̡ ̡͌l̡*̡̡ ̴̡ı̴̴̡ ̡̡͡|̲̲̲͡͡͡ ̲▫̲͡ ̲̲̲͡͡π̲̲͡͡ ̲̲͡▫̲̲͡͡ ̲|̡̡̡ ̡ ̴̡ı̴̡̡ ̡͌l̡̡̡̡.___

iQuit: The Cosmic Facepalm of Apple's Forgotten Father (30)

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Copyright 2025 @turboslut

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About the Podcast

Insignificuntly yours,
with @turboslut: Your daily dose of digital rebellion!
Pucker up, Little B’s! @turboslut is here to verbally bitchslap the tech industry, corporate America, and everything in between. This isn't your Pumpkin Spiced Latte of a podcast, sweetie. It's a triple-shot espresso enema for your brain, served with a side of "what the f@%k" and garnished with society's burning remains. We're about to go off the rails on this crazy train of modern life, and there is no safe word.

Join your host @turboslut and her reluctant AI-familiar, Geoffrey as they:
• Tear apart Silicon Valley's latest "innovations"
• Expose corporate bullshit faster than you can say "synergy"
• Serve up hot takes hotter than your overclocked GPU

Whether you're a code monkey, a wage slave, or just someone who's sick of the status quo, "Insignificuntly yours" is your wake-up call. It's time to question everything, laugh at the absurdity, and maybe start a revolution or two.

New episodes drop daily, because the world doesn't stop being ridiculous just because it's the weekend.

Warning: Contains explicit language, brutal honesty, and one minus one f@%ks given. Side effects may include uncontrollable laughter, existential dread, and a sudden urge to overthrow your corporate overlords.

Subscribe now, before the AI censors catch on!
You know you love me.
xoxo,
@turboslut
https://x.com/turboslut/

#TechRant #CorporateSatire #DigitalRebellion #NSFWComedy #AISass
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About your host

Profile picture for xoxo, @turboslut

xoxo, @turboslut

Self-proclaimed digital dominatrix and verbal arsonist. Part-time prophet, full-time pain in the ass of Silicon Valley. I'm the voice in your head that says "fuck it, let's burn it all down" – but make it funny. Born in the dial-up era, forged in the flames of tech bubbles and social media shitshow. I've got the mouth of a sailor, the mind of a revolutionary, the sex drive of a Sybian, and the attention span of a goldfish on TikTok. By day, I'm probably your IT person (yes, I've tried turning it off and on again). By night, I'm tearing apart the tech industry faster than you can say "planned obsolescence." If you can't handle the heat, stay out of my mentions. If you can, welcome to the revolution, baby! Slide into my DMs and then slide that D into my M =)

You know you love me ♥️